helikedmyshoes (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
helikedmyshoes) wrote2008-05-16 03:46 pm
helikedmyshoes) wrote2008-05-16 03:46 pm
Entry tags:
the life that you thought through is gone
I am incredibly emotional today. Maybe because I fucking cried again last night. I am sick to death of this weepy sad mopey bullshit.
I don't know why this feels different from all the other times there was someone else in the picture. But it does. I literally cannot think of anything else and I am so raw and crazy and exhausted and my back is so tense that Jerry came over to massage it last night and I cried out in pain because I was so tense. I just want to leave my brain for a while. It must be really nice to not have feelings.
I get a 45 minute break during a 14 hour day. I will not cry at work I will not cry at work I will not cry at work.
I don't know why this feels different from all the other times there was someone else in the picture. But it does. I literally cannot think of anything else and I am so raw and crazy and exhausted and my back is so tense that Jerry came over to massage it last night and I cried out in pain because I was so tense. I just want to leave my brain for a while. It must be really nice to not have feelings.
I get a 45 minute break during a 14 hour day. I will not cry at work I will not cry at work I will not cry at work.